Welcome to my solo book club meeting where I try to work through the many thoughts I had about the book MWF Seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend. (affiliate link for no reason because I don't expect you to actually buy the book)
In this episode I mostly talk about how men and women relate to each other as friends. I'm not sure if you read this book you will come up with as many complicated thoughts and emotions as I did, but I would love to talk to more people about it.
Do you think men and women can be friends? Do you think men and women have different types of friendships than two people of the same sex do?
Leave your thoughts here, or tweet me @cinn48
Interesting episode!
ReplyDeleteI would agree that the author of the book you mentioned does seem to have an overly simplified view of friendship, although it is true that often men cannot resist jumping to “Solution mode” in a conversation where someone just wants to express how they feel, and not feel alone in his/her feelings. I know I certainly am guilty of that from time to time. I wonder if it is an expression of the “macho” culture wherein feelings are to be ruthlessly managed, and any problems that serve as catalysts to strong feelings must be dealt with swiftly and decisively so the feelings can go away. Certainly not a healthy approach to things. To be human is to feel, and the most human thing of all is the ability to express feelings to others, and still be accepted.
As a person who is also guilty of jumping to "solution mode" I don't think it is about macho-ness, I think it is about a personality style. I think there is a difference between analytic versus empathetic personalities.
DeleteI'm constantly trying to remember to validate a persons feelings rather than fix their problems. I think that's okay though because it means I am more present in the conversation since I need to be aware of my own usual response and make a decision to respond differently. At least that's what I'm going to tell myself ;-)
Great post tthanks
ReplyDelete